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peter the spider from Mars

Joined: 25 Aug 2009 Posts: 7663
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Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2014 3:54 pm Post subject: Another Time Another Place |
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Dropping silently to his belly Avatar crawled the last twent feet through the undergrowth untill, disguised by both the pitch night blackness and thick untamed foliage, he could overhear what was passing between the rag-tag grouping surrounding the small camp fire.
There were eight of them in total, five men and three women as far as he could tell, and each was seated cross-legged as close to the fire as space and the heat would allow. Bowls of steaming broth occupied most of their attention but between crudely spooned mouthfulls a clearly heated debate was taking place.
"I say we take him down now!" said a large heavy-boned man, who Avatar could have sworn was weraring the face paint of a clown, "He's getting more confident by the day and we ain't getting no younger!"
The man fished in his bowl with thick and none to clean fingers, pulling out what might have been a goat vertibrae but equally might have belonged to the bands dog which had been missing for two days. He shrugged and popped the bone whole into his mouth. Crunching down as he spoke, a shower of spittle and bone acommpanied his measured opinion. "Cut down the body - then kill the head is what I say."
"Sarge, if you spit on me one more time today I swear I'm going to stick that goat jaw straight up your ass," said a boney faced individual lank of hair and dark of complexion. What the **** did you do to this mother anyway; it tastes more like shit-house rat than suckling kid."
Sarge shifted uncomfortably, surrepticiously slipping a piece of red dog-collar that had floated to the top of his bowl beneath his buttock before the others noticed it. "Vraith - if you can do better, then tomorrow get the fu...."
A loud crack from the undergrowth opposit where Avatar remained concealed had the group spinning to their feet, hands flying to knives, axes and machetes in readiness for whatever it was that could be heard pushing through the bush toward the camp.
"What the...!" said Vraith, as a small but perfectly formed girl pushed confidently out of the thicket and stood, hands on hips, grinning like an imp, "Lorin - correct me if I'm wrong - but aren't you supposed to be on a different planet?"
[......if you coninue it, I'll read it. A multi-authorial project done for fun . It lives, it dies, no harm done!....] _________________ http://jhfv.blogspot.co.uk/
....and the glory of the world becomes less than it was....
'Have we not served you well'
'Of course - you know you have.'
'Then let it end.'
We are the Bloodguard |
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Linna Heartbooger keeper of many stories

  Joined: 01 Oct 2007 Posts: 3661
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Posted: Wed Feb 04, 2015 12:36 am Post subject: |
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Just discovered this for the first time... I laughed so hard, even though I think there's a lot I'm not getting.
Have you told the people who are named in it?
peter wrote: | Sarge shifted uncomfortably, surrepticiously slipping a piece of red dog-collar that had floated to the top of his bowl... |
LOL!!! _________________ "We human beings do real harm. History could make a stone weep." -Gilead, by Marilynne Robinson
deer of the dawn's anti-recommendation of "Gilead"
My anti-recommendation of the same. (hers is shorter!)
Both are on the Watch's excellent "Anti-Recommendations of your Favorite Books" thread.
'"He will wipe the tears from all faces." It takes nothing from the loveliness of the verse to say that is exactly what will be required.' -Gilead, by Marilynne Robinson |
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Savor Dam Will Be Herd!

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Location: Pacific NorthWet 1684 White Gold Dollars
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Posted: Wed Feb 04, 2015 7:13 am Post subject: |
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Nice find-and-bump, Linna.
Good stuff, Peter. First of all, the tableau: Av lurking at the edge of the camp
Sarge & Vraith in camp...with a few more to whom we have not yet been introduced
Lorin (is she alone?) brashly emerging from the foliage Naming can't be coincidental. Having met a couple of your named players IRL (and reserving the possibility I also know some of the unnamed others), I hesitate to put words in their mouths, but I'd definitely follow a continued story.
There's ample precedent. After the 2011 fest, Sarge started an extensive-and-hilarious thread about the fictional adventures of many of the attendees. Over the years, there have been a few other threads that were either overt or thinly-veiled stories about people here.
We like reading about our community...unless we don't. _________________ Love prevails.
~ Tracie Mckinney-Hammon
Have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer.
~ Rainier Maria Rilke |
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sgt.null jack of odd trades; master of fun

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Posted: Fri Feb 13, 2015 8:03 pm Post subject: |
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I had missed this. it needs to continue. as I need to continue the fable. thank you for the kind Words SD>  _________________ “life's not a paragraph
And death i think is no parenthesis”
― E.E. Cummings |
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