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THOOLAH has returned to redeem your mortal soul.
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kevinswatch
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2014 6:37 pm    Post subject: THOOLAH has returned to redeem your mortal soul. Reply with quote

Greetings again, my Brothers and Sisters.

The time has returned for THOOLAH to reclaim its former glory.

As some of you may have heard, approximately nine years ago a humble organization was formed here at Kevin's Watch. It began as a fair and noble organization in its dreams and aspirations.

This group, of course, is The Holy Order of Linden Avery Haters.

See this following topic to remind yourself of simpler, less-Linden-filled, times:

http://kevinswatch.ihugny.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=8326

Since that origin topic, our membership has grown a thousand-fold. Tales of our tale have been told across the Land!

However, I am saddened to say that since that first proclamation of "THOOLAH!", we have seen seen the conclusion of four books of The Last Chronicles of Thomas Covenant become tainted by the Queen of Inaction, the Chosen of Averyness, She Who Should Never Have Been Named, I speak of course of Linden Avery.

NO MORE I SAY AGAIN!

I have created this topic to spark interest in a new generation of THOOLAH disciples. We have nearly 2000 pages of new hatred of Linden to document and scorn. I speak of course of unforgivable deeds such as:

-Having the nerve to set foot back into the Land and show her face again after swiping Covenant's ring from the floor of Kiril Threndor at the finale of White Gold Wielder.
-Releasing the whinyness of her adopted scion onto the Land.
-Spending approximately 900 pages (I'm rounding down) "thinking"
-Somehow making a metaphor out of unwashed pants.
-Wussing it up during the second half of The Last Dark, refusing to fight, even though she had *just* been given a shiny new white gold ring, which any normal person would have used to blast their enemies to tiny little bits.
-For having the nerve to use her feminine wiles to manipulate Stave and make him think unclean thoughts.
-And, you know, destroying the entire world. That kind of sucked too.

Amen amen I say again to you. Our time has returned.-jay
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aliantha
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2014 6:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Keep in mind who the forum mod is. Just sayin'. Evil or Very Mad Wink
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kevinswatch
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2014 6:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Keep in mind you made you mod. Wink

Razz

-jay
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Menolly
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PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2014 7:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Me thinks this thread should be stickied!
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MsMary
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 2:29 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

All hail THOOLAH!!! Hail Hail Hail


Jay, you are a riot. And I fully expect that this thread will end up being every bit as amusing as the original.

Big Grin
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***************************************
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- Is all right special Time Lord code for really not all right at all?

- You're all irresponsible fools!
- The Doctor: But we're very experienced irresponsible fools.






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aliantha
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 4:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Menolly wrote:
Me thinks this thread should be stickied!

Oh, fine. There. Happy? Razz Wink
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 4:54 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

aliantha wrote:
Menolly wrote:
Me thinks this thread should be stickied!

Oh, fine. There. Happy? Razz Wink


Makes me happy. Razz
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"The Cheat is GROUNDED! We had that lightswitch installed for you so you could turn the lights on and off, not so you could throw lightswitch raves!"
***************************************
- I'm always all right.
- Is all right special Time Lord code for really not all right at all?

- You're all irresponsible fools!
- The Doctor: But we're very experienced irresponsible fools.






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Menolly
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 10:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good Post
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 29, 2014 10:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Do I even need to say it?
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Really?
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Okay.
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THOOLAH!

u.
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 1:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

LOL
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***************************************
- I'm always all right.
- Is all right special Time Lord code for really not all right at all?

- You're all irresponsible fools!
- The Doctor: But we're very experienced irresponsible fools.






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aliantha
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 1:40 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Shocked

I'm surrounded. Quick, where's Wayfriend?
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 2:53 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Not sure where the Dean of Chrons Scholarship is, but I am here to empathize with you, ali, and to carry the LA banner.
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 2:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm here as well. I don't hate Linden.

But after reviewing the first page of posts of the original THOOLAH thread, I do have to say, Elena could nibble on me any time she wanted. What's with the Elena hate??
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Frostheart Grueburn
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 5:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks to TheFallen and his beloved anchovies, I recalled the existence of this other anti-THOOLAH motivational poster (more powerful than Goth Linden). Something that I ought to repost on every one of these sordid threads...Twisted Evil

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kevinswatch
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 12:04 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

^ Hahaha. Razz Nice picture.

THOOLAH forever! Wink

-jay
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wayfriend
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 1:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

That's a great artwork, FH. I had not seen it before.
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 2:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I hadn't seen it, either. Very cool, Frosty! Smile You might want to resize it, though -- it's requiring me to scroll across my 24-inch screen. Wink
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 2:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This is the BEST discussion thread EVER!!!!



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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 2:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Given the undeniable fact that this is indeed the BEST discussion thread EVER, I'm almost beholden to re-share this following snippet, which should interest all true Covenant fans.

Believed to be the only remaining fragment of a long-abandoned attempt by SRD to turn TCoTC into a stage musical, the song below is scored to the tune of "Yesterday" by The Beatles. Enjoy.

Covenant's Lament

Leprosy... I'm not half the man I used to be.
Pieces keep on dropping off of me
Since I contracted leprosy.

Avery... Linden's even worse than leprosy.
She keeps whining on and on at me.
Oh please shut up and let me be.

Why... I... am her beau, I don't know, I'd rather flee.
If I... must... choose between, I prefer my leprosy.

Eternally... there's some loser crying over me.
Jesus Christ, it's Linden Avery.
Can't she just leave and set me free?

Recently... I can't feel any extremity.
Plus Linden's whining is benumbing me.
Please God, let her be munched by She.

Leprosy... my right hand's digits run from one to three.
Just spare me from Ms. Avery.
I'd rather have my leprosy.


THOOLAH! THOOLAH! THOOLAH!

Twisted Evil
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This should not be considered as any condoning of the hypocritical, snowflake, bleeding heart, white guilt-ridden, compulsively virtue-signalling and totalitarian prog Left woke zealotry which some try to force upon this forum.
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kevinswatch
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PostPosted: Wed Jul 30, 2014 3:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

TheFallen wrote:

Covenant's Lament

Leprosy... I'm not half the man I used to be.
Pieces keep on dropping off of me
Since I contracted leprosy.

Avery... Linden's even worse than leprosy.
She keeps whining on and on at me.
Oh please shut up and let me be.

Why... I... am her beau, I don't know, I'd rather flee.
If I... must... choose between, I prefer my leprosy.

Eternally... there's some loser crying over me.
Jesus Christ, it's Linden Avery.
Can't she just leave and set me free?

Recently... I can't feel any extremity.
Plus Linden's whining is benumbing me.
Please God, let her be munched by She.

Leprosy... my right hand's digits run from one to three.
Just spare me from Ms. Avery.
I'd rather have my leprosy.


THOOLAH! THOOLAH! THOOLAH!

Twisted Evil


LOL Hail LOL Hail LOL

-jay
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