TMOHD Prologue and Chapter 1: Calling

Skyweir · Last edited by Skyweir on Tue Mar 11, 2003 2:12 am; edited 1 time in total

Steeped in the vaccuum of her dreams,
A mirror's empty till
A man rides through it.
John Myers Myers, Silverlock

Terisa and Geraden

The story of Terisa and Geraden began very much like a fable. She was a princess in a high tower. He was a hero come to rescue her. She was the only daughter of wealth and power. He was the seventh son of the lord of the seventh Care. She was beautiful from the auburn hair that crowned her head to the tips of her white toes. He was handsome and courageous. She was held prisoner by enchantment. He was a fearless breaker of enchantment.

The Mirror of Her Dreams [Prologue]......

the prologue really explains the dynamics of Terisa's enchanted prison .. her fathers control over her life as an adult. She wears clothes he chose for her .. lives in the condiminium he assigned for her .. Somewhere to keep her safe but also isolated .. isolated from him and his pressing lifestyle .. and out of his hair.

ok so it seems there is not a lot of love between father and daughter .. Terisa is akin to a possession. Kept in a safe place .. confined by perhaps the emotional abuse of neglect.

this neglect seems to have affected Terisa in that she suffers attacks of anxiety or similar .. where she struggles for a grasp on her reality .. her existence ..

I guess because of the way she was raised .. eventhough an attractive young girl .. she has no sense of self-value .. We are told her body was of a type praised in magazines .. that even though men that might have considered her beautiful or desirable seemed not to notice her.

This is interesting .. for what man fails to notice a beautiful or desirable woman?? Clearly Terisa dressed and held herself in such a way that perpetuated her perception of lacking material being.

It is interesting that the way one may feel about oneself is communicated to those around us .. in unmistakable language! The language of self-depreciating behaviour .. the language of un-confidence .. the language of non-caring.

It would seem because Terisa struggles for some tangible evidence of her actual material being .. that she feels inconsequential in and of herself .. that she lacks the tang of vitality .. that those who are filled with the exuberance of life have.

She lacks any real interest in the world around her .. she works in the mission but sees it as entirely futile .. she seems not to have any real commitment to this work .. she is just there and does what she is required .. She seems incapable of enthusiasm .. But the horns .. give her a taste of something vital .. she sees hope where she only perceived despair ..

Also in her dream she did not really care if she were killed or not by the marauding attackers. She lay there watching all the commotion surround her .. she watched one come to her defence ..

Maybe this act on her defenders part .. was what changed something inside of her .. but suddenly .. although she could not muster any resources on her own behalf .. she sat up and called out a warning to him!!

Maybe the source of her problems are deep and complex .. but maybe also her need was simple! Primarily this act of her defender .. affirmed her exixtence and this in turn gave her some sense of realness and vitality.

What do you think? Is anyone aware of what Terisa's issue with her existence is? Is there an identifiable illness or condition which anyone may be aware of?

Clearly she suffers attacks .. as it is outlined in the first chapter .. It is not hard to appreciate why she has these feelings about herself .. is it?

On my first reading of this .. I felt .. ugghh god .. another melodramatic beginning .. poor little rich girl .. why doesnt she snap out of this mind-set .. and sieze what she does have .. and make the best of it ..

but its not as simple as that .. I realise now .. her problems are deep-seated .. rooted in her from child-hood. Maybe even from before .. we learn her mother was similarly inert .. both victims to an overbearing manupulative control freak.

There's so much in these first few passages ..
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health and healing

'Smoke me a kipper .. I'll be back for breakfast!'

Ryzel

duchess of malfi · Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2003 5:40 pm Post subject:

I am no mental health clinician, but I would think that both depression and extremely low self-esteem would be fairly normal result for a person who has received such an amount of emotional neglect and abuse for her entire life. isn't her father's controlling behavior one of the key benchmarks/signs in the personality of an abuser?
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Love as thou wilt.

Ryzel · Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2003 6:43 pm Post subject:

I am not a mental health expert either, but her father seems to be very similar to the more popular image of psychopaths (no emotions, controlling behavior, patterns of abuse etc.).

As for whether or not it is normal for someone to develop these traits when subjected to this kind of emotional abuse I cannot say. It is certainly not uncommon, but what is more uncommon IMO is the way this emotional imbalance manifests itself.

Notice how Terisa is almost the opposite of TC in that while TC is rejected by his surroundings because of his leprosy she on the other hand rejects herself (and by extension her surroundings, note how everything around her seems futile to her at least) because of her detachment.
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"Und wenn sie mich suchen, ich halte mich in der Nähe des Wahnsinns auf." Bernd das Brot

duchess of malfi · Posted: Mon Mar 10, 2003 7:02 pm Post subject:

Yes, TC shows rage/anger at the world/others as a sign of his probable depression. Terisa shows detachment from both herself AND the world as a sign of her possible depression. One becomes lost inside himself, the other lost from herself. Confused

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Love as thou wilt.

Skyweir · Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2003 2:27 am Post subject:

yes .. interesting contrast to TC ..

the dream was interesting wasnt it? Why would she hear these horns in her regular life? They were so pervasive and insistent that they brought about a material change in Terisa didnt they? They gave her

danlo · Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2003 2:48 am Post subject:

Yes, Ryzel, very good superimposition of Terisa on TC! Whereas a man in the same position might turn his depression and lack of self worth in2 an addiction 2 anger, Terisa turns it in2 an addiction of complete anonimity. Following Ryzel's train...prehaps the Horns r a type of "Beggar's Note" in an odd sort of way...is it a "wake up call" or has she just snapped?
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"The day science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all previous centuries of it's existence."~Nikola Tesla

Ryzel · Posted: Tue Mar 11, 2003 8:04 am Post subject:

I think that the horns are definitely a wake up call. As for how she could hear them in her real life I do not know.

Spoiler:

Although I guess it could be a manifestation of her talent for imagery. Possibly an innate ability to create auguries without mirrors, a sort of prophetic sight perhaps.

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"Und wenn sie mich suchen, ich halte mich in der Nähe des Wahnsinns auf." Bernd das Brot

Earthblood · Posted: Tue Mar 18, 2003 7:06 pm Post subject:

She definitely seems to suffer from some sort of depression.

I know a few people (my childhood next door neighbor for one) who acted similarly when treated similarly. He was not really loved by his family & tended to melt away into the background when interacting with others. He was always put down & "shushed" as a child & he never could deal well with others. He would at times make desperate & pathetic attempts to garner friendship with anyone, but never be able to maintain a meaningful relationship with them.
Seems like Terisa is making an attempt to integrate with 'real' people, but does not have the skills to maintain the relationships formed (the minister, her parents).

I think the horns are the awakening of a part of her being that desperately wants to be in a relationship that means something.

IMHO....
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"You're afraid of yourself."

danlo · Posted: Wed Mar 19, 2003 4:23 pm Post subject:

Xactly right Earthy! When do the next chapts commence?
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"The day science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all previous centuries of it's existence."~Nikola Tesla

duchess of malfi · Posted: Fri Mar 21, 2003 7:27 pm Post subject:

Very good question, Lord Danlo! Very Happy

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Love as thou wilt.

Skyweir · Posted: Mon Mar 24, 2003 1:25 am Post subject:

I humbly apologise .. I havent been on the computer since this whole war thing began .. I just couldnt face posting ..

Well the war is still going .. but my ability to reconcile my inability is on its way to improving .. Shocked

.. I think .. Screwy

So I will post a chapter 2 today .. we should go chapter by chapter each week .. unless someone wants to do more .. then please feel at liberty to lead the discussion with 2 chapters.

After I post todays .. next monday .. anyone .. who wants to take up the gauntlet and run with the next 1 or 2 chapters please dont wait for me to do it .. first in first served!

Whoever posts each consecutive week first .. then that will be the lead discussion post for that week ..

We will make a new thread for each weekly discussion .. yay or nay? I think so .. not that the discussion threads are particularly large but someone may want to add a view if they join the discussion late ..

Whatever you want .. its fine .. just let us know ..

ok will go to the next chapter now
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health and healing

'Smoke me a kipper .. I'll be back for breakfast!'

MsMary · Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2003 2:24 am Post subject:

Revan · Posted: Wed Jan 28, 2004 3:00 pm Post subject:

I have brought this book now... and have read only these two chapters and a bit of chapter two... She's a little Vain... Isn't she... Heh... though I thought Geraden entrance was weird... but funny. I don't understand fully though... How did Terisa get to the way she was?
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dANdeLION · Posted: Wed Jan 28, 2004 3:03 pm Post subject:

I don't think the mirrors are there for Teresa's vanity. I think they're there for Teresa's sanity.
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Dandelion don't tell no lies
Dandelion will make you wise
Tell me if she laughs or cries
Blow away dandelion

Against All Things THOOLAH

High priest of THOOOTP

Hobbes

*

* This post carries Jay's seal of approval

danlo · Posted: Wed Jan 28, 2004 3:06 pm Post subject:

Mainly her dad--neglect--kept of of sight--very low self esteem--locked in closets...(keep going! For guys the first 1/3rd is a little "romancy/fairytaleish feel" but it gets SO much better!)
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"The day science begins to study non-physical phenomena, it will make more progress in one decade than in all previous centuries of it's existence."~Nikola Tesla

duchess of malfi · Posted: Wed Jan 28, 2004 5:00 pm Post subject:

Darth, Terisa was subjected to abuse and neglect thoughout her life. Her behavior is a result of that. In chapter after chapter, you will find little signs that she is learning, literally, how to feel emotions and act in a much more normal fashion...this book subtly describes her spiritual and emotional journey...and sets the stage for the person she will become in the second book...
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Love as thou wilt.

Revan · Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 12:34 pm Post subject:

Cool... But one thing that did annoy me... Is how unshocked she was to be there... Though I consider this to be because of her detachment in her life. But it is getting better. I hope we see Geraden again... I liked him... Very decent and clumsy... Smile

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Earthblood · Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 1:01 pm Post subject:

Good point dan - the mirrors are there for her sanity - so she can look and see that she actually exists, because of her reflections.

Mirrors play an important role in our Miss Terisa's life, as you will see.. Wink

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"You're afraid of yourself."

Revan · Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2004 1:13 pm Post subject:

Will we see Geraden again? I was wondering... I liked him...
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